Persephone: Parent

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Happy Birthday Me! I Love You All.

on July 19, 2013

I have been out and about all day – still hot, but lovely breeze – so can’t write a full on post, but I want to say a huge thank you to this fantastic online community.

Yesterday’s post scored new viewing highs for this blog, saw many new followers and became my highest commented post.

Truly, learning that this is not abnormal, the unspoken pains of newbie motherhood, the loneliness, the feeling trapped, that others have been there and that it isn’t just me, it means the world. It really does.

I’m not too good at talking, well I love talking – I rarely shut up – but I don’t like talking. I don’t trust my emotions, don’t trust myself not to cry. I don’t want my friends and family to think I’m weak, for them to feel sorry for me. Although I hide nothing from this blog and don’t hide it from my friends and family, I can ignore their sympathy online as it rarely occurs in person.

But to share my problems, my little/huge hiccups with this fantastic online community that is physically anonymous and to be told by survivors that I’m normal, that I can and will survive, it means the world. I love you all for helping me get through this.

I started this blog describing my journey of trying to conceive as like a war. First you’re in the trenches, praying and hoping to make it out. Then, the lucky ones make it onto no-man’s land, they get pregnant, where they hope to dodge every bullet and grenade coming their way to make it to the other side. Now this elusive other side is all they’ve wanted for years. They’ve suffered month after month of heartbreak and pain to get there, they have physically, emotionally and perhaps financially paid to get there. It’s supposed to be perfect, right? They’ve been preparing for it for years, right? They’re strong enough after the trenches, right?

There are still battles on the other side. Smaller ones. Daily. Hand to hand combat. Perhaps some Miles Matheson style sword fights. But you all made it, and show me it’s normal. I will fight every day. I will survive The Other Side. Thanks to you, reading this!

~ Persephone M

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