Persephone: Parent

A fine site

Boys In My Bed

on July 28, 2013

Depending on my mood, I’m either perfectly content bed sharing with Elvis, petrified of cot death by bed sharing or annoyed by bed sharing.

According to my research, I’ve minimised most risks of SIDS whilst bed sharing. Our only risk factors are that he’s under 3 months old and he’s a boy! Both factors increase his risk of SIDS and the male thing, well he was born that way!

Yet 2 out of 3 times I wish I wasn’t bed sharing. But I see no way out of it.
Despite his weight/size, Elvis is not even 10 weeks old yet so is still tiny. A fact on my mind all night long. I sleep always facing him as I’m concerned that if I face away and then roll back to him… plus he sleeps more in the middle of the bed so he’s not close to the edge.

To safely bed share there is no duvet on the bed (only positive with this heatwave) but I do have a sheet. I don’t pull it up past my waist so there’s no chance of it smothering him.

Sometimes my hip hurts from lying on it 3 hours straight. Sometimes my arm hurts from being placed over him but not touching him. Sometimes I get cold or at least my shoulder does.

Most times I wish it was a different boy in my bed.

I miss my husband.

There’s no room for Elvis beside our bed so he’s either in our bed or in another room. There are 2 reasons I don’t want him in another room. First off, he gets very coughy and mucousy in the morning. It scares me when I’m right next to him. He also becomes a fidget about the same time.

Second reason is I don’t have to get up to feed him. I don’t even wake up! Not fully. Putting him into his cot in another room, although not far away, would make my nights less restful.

So I have to keep having the wrong boy in my bed until we can either move or night time feeds stop. I miss my husband; I’m doing the bedtime feed in our bed and he’s settling himself for another night on the sofa.

I also miss my duvet. I miss my husband more.

~ Persephone M

2 responses to “Boys In My Bed

  1. Oh boo đŸ˜¦ Co-sleeping can be tough. Such a bummer you don’t have space in your room to have him close by. Not even for a moses basket? It sounds like he might be too big to fit in one now though. I wasn’t a big co-sleeper but I probably would have done it more had the bassinet not fitted in our room. I wouldn’t have coped with him in a different room either. Good luck! You are doing a great job. This phase doesn’t last forever.

    • Persephone says:

      He fidgets so much from 4am that I don’t sleep too much! But if I put him in his own bed he might not sleep as well as he does in with me. Maybe it’s just annoyance that I spend all day *and* all night with him. Feeding is so much easier is all!

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