Persephone: Parent

A fine site


on August 31, 2014

I’ve moved house. Yay?

Well, I absolutely ache all over. I am never moving house again. Never ever ever. Except if we ever decide to make the move out of town to get the garden. If hubby starts down a new road at work. Or if we win the lottery. Or if we have more than 3 children. When those things are satisfied, I’ll consider moving. But one thing I do promise is that I am never moving whilst pregnant ever again!

I last moved about 2 years ago. Pregnant with Elvis. Why didn’t I learn from that event?

All I really did was make sure that stuff was packed, unpacked a few bits and bobs. Oh, yeah and went on a mammoth walk because Elvis needed a nap and there was no bed ready for him (despite all of my planning, someone did not get my toddler’s room ready first). I ache. The only thing that hasn’t really hurt at some point over the past few days is actually my pelvis! So, nothing actually pregnancy related (on that note, I think I’ve ballooned over night and am clearly pregnant – bump is also harder now so less like a ball of fat!). It’s been quite stressful.

Do you know what kept me going through the worst moments? Through the arguments, the hang up phone calls, the pain and exreme tiredness? Elvis!

Hubby and I have always been bickerers. We have had monumentally huge, shouting, slamming doors arguments. It’s kinda who we are. Except the extremeness has gone since Elvis came along. Even in those first few stressful weeks of Elvis’ life where we did argue, we did say things we didn’t mean, I think we both walked out on the other in one way or another, there were never raised voices. Elvis has never witnessed one of our classic arguments and I would never want him to. But I sometimes feel quite proud of our bickering. It’s who we are. A relationship where you both agree on everything bores me. A relationship where one person always shuts down the other reeks of emotional abuse to me. But a relationship where two people have different views and are never afraid to voice them to each other, that’s my kind of relationship. Probably because hubby is the only one I’ll actually voice my opinion to. He’s the only one who won’t leave, no matter what I say, friends and family can leave if they don’t like my true opinions on things.

Anyway, after all of this time without a major argument, moving weekend was likely to see one. And it did. Yes, I am not proud whatsoever, but we were shouting at each other across a room with Elvis in between us. And do you know what that boy did?

That 15 month old little toddler, ignored his parents raised voices, seeming to not even hear and continued playing his new game. We only had the one chair, a bean bag chair that I bought hubby for Christmas and 8 months later he finally got to unwrap it. Well, Elvis loves it. He climbs up onto it and then slides himself down, giggling as he lands on the floor. He loves it so much, I’m not allowed to sit on it. No one is allowed to sit on it. It’s his, much to his father’s chagrin. He even has a particular side that he wants to sit on (after a few hours) and if we put him on the wrong side he climbs down and walks around to his side. So there we are shouting and there he is climbing, sliding, giggling, climbing, sliding, giggling, repeat. Until finally his giggling distracted us both and then we were both laughing, forgetting our argument.

Oh, how he surprises me!

Later on, as hubby was doing another box run, Elvis was playing with a room literally that has a floor covered in toys and he started to pass me his animal train and complain at me. Although he seems to have learnt a few new signs, and forgotten others, Elvis’ communication skills are not too good, so I had no idea what he wanted as he kept thrustin gme his animal train. Now, this animal train has always lived at Nanny’s house and has a giraffe, monkey and elephant on it. He hasn’t played with it that much, but I randomly said “Where’s the elephant?” Now, I’ve taken the approach that I am not about to start trying to teach my son animals. I think there are far more important things for him to be learning at the moment (like to speak in general), so I haven’t ever purposefully taught him his animal train animals. However, I do read to him and point out things or tell him what something is when he hands me some random toy, still imagine my surprise when he locates (amongst a floor covered in toys) the elephant!

Then at bedtime, I followed him to the stairs and he made it up two stairs alone (before getting distracted by the new staircase). Now, it was months ago that Elvis learnt to crawl up and down the stairs. I loved it because I could carry other stuff up and down as long as I stayed right behind him of course because even crawling up/down he could get over excited and stumble. About 2 months ago, probably due to nursery, Elvis decided he didn’t want to crawl anymore. Nope, he wanted to walk. Which involves my hand so no more carrying other stuff! Then he decided he wanted to walk down the stairs. Okay, progress. And then, the day of the move, he managed up two stairs on his own!

And for the final surprise of the moving weekend, he signed food to me! Since I learnt the signs for drink, food, bed and more, they are the constant ones that I have always signed so, yeah, it was frustrating that a year later, Elvis hadn’t picked up any of those – but he had picked up help and bath-time (although help seems to have disappeared now). I have to admit, I kinda gave up. And yesterday, out of the blue, Elvis pointed at his food bowl and then signed food. Oh, my god! This boy is literally surprising me all of the time.

At the nursery the other day I watched two girls chasing each other around screaming gleefully as they did so and I thought, “Yeah, Elvis won’t do that sort of thing”.These past few days he has been running around on his own at home, screaming as he goes. So maybe he does play with others. Andwhen we tell him to find his shoes he starts going “shshshsh”. I think he’s trying to have a first word! I didn’t even have sounds at his age. And one of the best surprises of the moving weekend, after an exhausting day for mummy and daddy, Elvis in a strange bedroom that’s far darker than he’s used to, slept all night long. We needed that sleep! So, thank you, son, for surprising me constantly, for breaking up arguments with your giggles, for amaxing me with your developments and, mostly, right now, sleeping all night!

I love that boy!

~ P

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